i think everyone from my batch is turning into someone i don't know. they changed, if not drastically, a little. don't get me wrong about this. even i, i'm pretty much sure that i changed a little. i am writing about this because i find it really hard to accept the fact that my friends will never be the same again as i last remembered them to be.. oh damn.. i so hate myself for feeling this way..
i miss the times when teetin would call me late at night just to chika and sometimes confide her ill feelings about the people around. i miss the times that my roomates would wake me up in the middle of the night because my fone is ringing, only to hear a crying teetin. i miss the times when that shit happens.. she cries.. later on i can make her laugh like crazy.. i miss sharing my happiness to my closest friends..
i miss the times when sara and i would speak the same words.. that is, with the same intonation, same wahas delivery, all at the same time.. hmm.. i wonder how my gmta is doing at up right now.. i really miss her.. i miss the overnights at her house.. my ever beloved media room where i find solemnity and peace.. haha!! i miss her cartwheels and splits and the oasi practices that we attended together..
i miss my insan.. i miss her oh-so-poised movements.. i miss the times when we would talk about going to sm, and finding myself riding a taxi on the way to sm the next day.. i miss the way irene talk some sense into me.. the times when she would rant about my attitude towards a thing... later on i would realize that irene was right, that i had been so inconsiderate to their feelings.. that all i did was think about myself, not thinking about how they would feel.. i miss the times when we would play dance revo.. i miss the free tokens and the free fare and everything that comes along with irene..
i miss the lloyd that i had been friends with from freshmen field day.. i miss the times when he would make us laugh our hearts out.. i miss his sosy-high personality.. yes, even that.. i miss my vanity mode.. that is, through his ever accomodating cellphone.. i even miss the times when he would be so sad for days, and then suddenly becoming happy.. forgetting the sad things that he felt almost immediately.. i miss lloyd.. my healthiest friend.
i miss this beautiful girl that i had shared friendship with since second year.. i miss her sweet voice and good thoughts.. i miss her baking powers, the cookies and cakes that she made.. one would really think that they came from red ribbon after tasting her pastries.. i miss her bopol moments.. the times when she would just laugh like crazy over some joke that are not that funny.. oh.. how i miss toni..
this.. this is the very reason why i'm feeling this way.. the thought of not experiencing these things again with my closest friends.. no matter how people assure me that these things could still happen again, i still find it hard to believe.. i hate it when i'm feeling retarded.. when i suddenly find myself reminiscing the past.. the past that, no matter how hard i try, could not happen again. :'c
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